Thursday 6 March 2008

Ladies Matter 5

Shyam wonders...

"Why do women always rush to be hospitable? Whether it's just making the tea or getting the drinks, whether at home or at work? Even when a male colleague offers to make tea for everybody (a rare occurrence), most of the women in my office always refuse and counter-offer with"I'll do it" - and of course the guys just sit back after that. And this in a supposedly less chauvinistic workplace in a western country!"

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Wow Shyam! That is new! If someone offers to make tea or coffee for me, I usually let them do it and enjoy the hospitality whether girl or guy. It is true though when am the hostess, I rush to do stuff even if others offer to help.

A Motley Tunic said...

Even if I am the hostess, if someone offers, I will readily let them take over.

Shirsha said...

Shyam, cud being hospitable just be one of those girly traits!? I love having guests over, and being a host. I dont care if someone expects me to or not.

Anonymous said...

I totally agree with Laksh - my views completely. And if someone offers to make tea when I am hostess, chances are I will politely refuse. Unless I know for a fact that the person who does things (in this example, tea making) will make it my way, I won't relinquish control. Yeah, I know, I am weird :)

Shammi said...

I was talking about the workplace in my rant, where it's not any one person's "duty" to be hospitable, nor is getting drinks just the women employees' job!

Laksh, a-kay: At home I love being the host and I would definitely refuse to have a casual guest serve me in my home.

And Shirsha, why should hospitality be a "girly trait"? Why shouldnt men be expected to be just as hospitable as women?

Anonymous said...

Shyam,

Workplace or any other place, I still would let whoever offers to make food go ahead :) Am just a lazy bum!

Laksh

Shirsha said...

Shyam, hospitality doesn't have to be a girly trait, but its just that I've seen more girls being hospitable than guys. Its probably another of those things that came w the gender.
I mean, its not a social norm, its more of a gender trait!

Anonymous said...

Well, at work, I usually don't make coffee :) But that said, I have seen more women being hospitable than me - probably got to do with how we were raised. I have probably seen women (usually) offer a glass of water when someone comes to the house than men do and this is re-enforced by the media - TV serials or movies. I think this is nurture than nature

meerkat said...

shyam maybe these people know something that you dont. i.e. the tea the men make is crap or even worse they have a questionable attitude to personal hygiene ;)
meera

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Shyam,

Well, I dont know about the supposed less chauvinistic society you live in. But in India, I think coffee and tea making is not gender based. If a guy knows to make amazing coffee or tea, I would happily sit back and enjoy it. Afterall the hands which make it doesnt matter, the final outcome does!!!

I think we have moved from trivialities of coffee and tea making long back!!!!

Sangeetha said...

Shyam,
Good question to ponder! Either it is her maternal instincts or the need to have it her way, makes a woman decline a male's offer to help especially in the kitchen. I for one have demanded my male friends or my better half to make tea/coffee for me....although it is not made my way, I just sit back and enjoy being pampered (even though I demanded it!)