Anuja's gripe is this...
"Why is it that men who drink are seen as professional, macho, cool, manly while women who drink are seen as promiscuous and slutty and immoral? Why is it that men who sleep around are congratulated for their numerous conquests but a woman who does is considered of having no values? Why are men and women judged on different criteria? Notice how bachelor and spinster have different connotations?
On a vaguely unrelated note, I wonder how destabilizing it will be for the Indian society when women refuse to be expected to conform and do the housework and take care of the kids but insist on sharing responsibility with the men.
Ah I feel better now. Thank you!"
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6 comments:
Anuja,
Like I said in an earlier comment, we are the generation in the middle. Not sure how many of our moms drank vs dads or smoked for that matter. In my generation, I think we are more accepting of the changing social mores. We will see the equation change but will be a time before we see it.
Laksh
Anuja, a lot of this doesn't hold anymore. Not in my world. And I look down pitifully at the ones who subscribe to these points of view still! Wake up babe!
Same here. Lot of things have changed, I know a lot of women who drink. I think the perception has changed a lot in our generation. Wrt to the previous generation, it is a totally different ball game, I don't know many men (and hardly any women) who smoked or drank. So, things are changing... not sure if it is for the better though.
Anuja, world is changing, albeit slowly!!! Have to agree that men drinking and women drinking are still not seen in the same perpective. I have come across, profiles in matrimonial columns, where men write they drink, smoke etc., But would it be ok if the same thing written done by a woman!!!!
Many of us are lucky to live in societies where these double standards hold true less and less. Still, the tradition of associating the positive and strong with the male (stud) and the negative and weak with the female (slut, sissy) is all too prevalent in various parts of the world.
No hard feelings, Anuja. It's all to do with evolution. Survival and Reproduction are the primary goals of any species. We are automatically inclined towards behaviour that improves our chances of survival and reproduction.
Women have been choosing men who can improve their chances of survival and raise their status in society - Rich, strong, powerful etc. Men have been relying on their own selves for survival.
Men are drawn towards feminine women who can have babies and raise them. Men have gotten used to sowing their wild oats and spreading their seed. A man can make more babies in a year than a woman can.
In the modern society, there has been a mixing of gender roles. But evolutionary instincts are difficult to get rid of. Not just for the men, but for women too.
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